It's so New York: "When the paradox of our lives hits me, I cling even more to the good moments." / Lily Milat grabs a shelf

I booked this vacation in August 2023. Yes, that's me, like the Europeans I book vacations months in advance. August last year feels like decades ago. Everything that happened before October 7th feels far away, another life. And I wanted to cancel, because who wants or can think of a vacation and the Israeli press is like it did one hand and shows us only the black outside of half a pin on the map of the world that we are.

Still, a combination of too big a fine if I cancel and wonderful advice from a friend who lives in New York and I decided to stick to the travel plan. Until the plane took off I didn't believe it would happen. Someone must stop it; The war heating up in the north will spread like the fires burning around here or a peace tower will fall on me.

But nothing stopped the ascent Al Al And so, my young daughter and I bit into the big apple and not only were we not poisoned Snow White style, I'm here to tell a first-hand view of New York these days.

We stayed in an apartment close to Columbia University. In the past, when I visited New York, I liked walking around the campus there, but this time I avoided taking my daughter to the conflict zone, even though the protest camp set up there was evacuated a month before we arrived. There's enough New York to be in without it.

In the first two days I admit that I was looking for evidence of anti-Israel, my eyes ran around, examined, scanned, but except for a tiny mask with the inscription "free Palestine" on some random girl, which I would have surely missed if I wasn't on alert, I didn't find the ones demanding our harm.

If anything, I found the pictures of the abductees taped to posts at a bus stop on West 76th Street. We saw both a changing presentation on another street and in New Jersey on the way to Newark for a return flight, a huge billboard caught my eye and it took me a moment to understand what I was seeing - little Kafir Biebs asking the world to see him, to release him to a life he didn't have time to enjoy.

Every time they asked where we were from, of course I didn't hide or anything, but I did have to respond. I quickly realized how many Jews there are in Manhattan and how many of them are looking to express solidarity. I'm sure there are others, but I haven't come across them.

Eight days in New York were like the miracle of the oil tin, every day enlightened us; In the weather, in the beauty of the city, in the ecstasy of the underground, in the musicals, in the carriage of the Central Park, on the 102nd floor of the Empire State Building, in the Shabbat dinner with our friends, in the statue of freedom, in the Hungarian cafe in the neighborhood where we were staying.

But all these are a decoration for what we really received - freedom. To be for a few days in a place where bereavement does not rule, in a place where the homeless are few and are not evicted from their homes due to bombings, in a place where they do not really look for us but simply let us be. 

No, it's not a disconnect. No, this is not an escape from reality. This is a rest from her. However, reality hit me on the first phone call I received from my soldier. Unfortunately, bereavement met her when she lost her classmate in Gaza. And I, standing outside JFK, getting into the yellow cab, looking at the city I've been waiting to return to and my heart goes out to the soldier.

When the paradox of our life hit me, I held on even more to the good moments, to the experiences we created - everything took on a more powerful tone, more valued. I cried and laughed, hurt and smiled big. I never thought that the mind could work like this, but it turns out that its vastness is sublime and it is bigger than life itself and capable of it.

One of the days was, of course, dedicated to a visit to New York's amazing library and bookstores. On the street leading to the library, on both sides of the street, quotations are embedded as milestones, a sort of Avenue of the Stars in front of the Hall of Literature. As the number of shops I visited, so the number of books I wanted to bring home with me. The choice was both difficult and wonderful.

The cultural wealth surrounded me. I equipped myself with Fran Leibovich's book, which I will surely read and write to you about. And among the books I had equipped myself with, I chose to read during the visit the book that tells about the city from the point of view of a local journalist.

New York Times editor Dan Saltzstein wrote and collected short stories and tweets that tell what New York is for the writers. in his book, It's so New York That's So New York, there is, among other things, an interview with kids who love the subway, people who tell what the craziest thing that happened to them in New York and New York terminology for the advanced.

It's not the most brilliant book I've read, but it was fun to read and suitable to spend the visit in New York with. He made me wonder if there was an audience for a book similar to the one written about Haifa.

One of the reasons I bought this book was the "law and order" chapter that is there. On the back cover it was written that it is so New York to happen upon the set of "Law and Order" and I immediately went back to November 2008, my first visit to New York.

I arrived at night at my friends apartment, where I was staying. In the morning, I went out into the street (the frozen one! How cold it is there in November) and across the road there is a synagogue and at the entrance to it there are cameras and staff and what not. I crossed the road to start getting to know New York by foot, the main actor passed in front of me, smiled, said hello, I smiled back and continued on the trip.

Later that week, in the elevator of the building with my friend, we met Inigo Montoya, only then did it become clear to me that he is actually Jewish and has family in Israel. Indeed, it is so New York…

The book is in English so the following quote, from the chapter "The Art of Saying Peace in New York", is brought to you here in my free translation: "I learned about very personal things of strangers and even told very personal things to strangers, because I needed to talk to someone. (This city is full of psychologists). It's so expensive here, but talking to people is free."

Regarding the question whether remains or is released In my private library, 'It's so New York' by Dan Saltzstein remaining To remind me of the pleasure that the island of Manhattan gave me on days when it is not easy to reach.

I wish you to find good days and moments with your loved ones, go on vacation if possible and come back with a new song in your heart. I'll go with a Bob Dylan quote - "So long, New York", until the next visit. 

Pleasant reading and may good words be by your side always,
Lily