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Excessive worry • The consequences and how to deal with it

we care It's in our nature. Deeply embedded in the parental, marital, social, self space. Everything is worrying. The livelihood, the children, the health of the parents, the situation in the country, the pollution of the earth, and what not. Everything is just worrying. For moments there is relief, but most of the time the worry is present. She no longer crawls, does not emerge, but is present in all her power. It's called over-worrying. A situation where the worry is excessive and interferes with the normal flow of life.

Worry takes a lot of energy

Some people associate concern with caring. It seems as if if we care then we are fine, because how will we prove that we love if we don't care. "Obviously we worry. He is dear to our hearts, we want him to be well, so when it is not clear exactly what is happening, we worry."

And there are those who connect concern with action. "Worrying is work, it fills the whole day. Worrying takes a lot of energy" the worriers will say. "There is no energy left for anything else. On the other hand, when we worry about things, then we pay attention to them. If we don't worry, we won't be involved and things will fade away. Worrying is our obligation, and without worry we will forget things and create delays. We worry even if it exhausts us They make sure that the payments are made on time, they make sure that they arrive at the appointed time, they make sure that they have what is needed so that nothing is missing. It is easy to worry, but without it there are no results."

And others simply worry: "Because the world is complex, because there are troubles and dangers, because innocence is gone and nothing is certain anymore. Even the things that are supposed to be stable, like work, family, health, you can no longer know what will happen, and that is worrying. It seems that as soon as we stop worrying Something terrible will happen, so we worry all the time."

Arena mainly takes care of the children. Sometimes to her husband, and even more rarely to herself. Every time one of the children leaves the house, she goes into a state of worry, and as the hours pass it gets worse. Then she calls me. "I'm worried. He left three hours ago with the car for a job interview, and he doesn't answer my phone. I call him and it sends me to voicemail. I'm going crazy with worry," she says, and I try to calm down. I tell her that she should trust the boy, because the boy is already 32 years old, and he is responsible, and if he doesn't answer the phone, he is probably busy now, and I am sure that as soon as he is free, he will call you.

In the evening she calls again, says that he was indeed in a meeting and called her immediately when he saw that there were missed calls, but she is very worried about her daughter. "The daughter started a relationship with a dubious guy, she doesn't tell me who he is, and they talk on the phone all day. I'm afraid something bad will happen to her. She's so innocent. I'm already going crazy with worry," she says, and I'm on a quest to reassure her, reminding her that the little She is 28 years old and has already had several relationships, and that she should direct her but not run her life. It's okay to worry, but don't go crazy with worry. She calms down, and it is clear to me that tomorrow she will call again and again go crazy with worry.

The tense wait for something bad to happen

Excessive worry does not give rest, it floods the person with negative thoughts, a tense wait for something difficult and bad to happen, and this haunts the person with thoughts, imaginations and fears. Excessive worry damages the quality of sleep, the digestive system, blood pressure, muscles, and the experience of life in general, which becomes tense and lacks optimism. Many times excessive worry is accompanied by anxiety, fears and the creation of traumatic dramas. Family ties are damaged and the ability to hold down a job or concentrate on something that is not worrying becomes more difficult when excessive worry and anxieties are not addressed.

You should talk about it with friends, with professionals, you should try to say sentences of positive thinking, like sending positive energy to places where there is concern. Instead of worrying every time the children go out with the car, to say, I trust them, I send them protection, the universe will protect them so that they travel safely and return safely.

The positive talk and sharing of friends or professionals, helps to feel better and to calm the over-anxiety. Part of the thing about over worrying is the feeling that there is no one to save, no one to support and we are alone and helpless in our worry. When we share, it gives a sense of relief.

Worrying disturbs sleep and increases the tension that the body holds. You should meditate, do light physical activity, yoga or any exercise that relieves tension and diverts your mind and body from worrying. At the same time, it is advisable to swim, get massages, reflexology, acupuncture or any treatment that will help release the tensions that burden the physical body.

Concern (Illustration: Tami Goldstein)

Beautiful Watching thriller series. "If I don't do something I start to worry. I have a lot of reasons to worry. When I start it doesn't leave me, so I watch series, especially suspense series because it distracts, and read books, and that's how I actually seem to move to places in my imagination where I'm not I need to worry. As soon as the series ends, I immediately remember that I need to check if my mother needs anything from me, what's going on with my friends, no one is really well, everyone needs to worry.

Does my concern help them? Not really but I'm worried because what can be done? When everything is fine I can stop worrying. But here, now they found a lump at my brother's. So don't worry? And my mother is alone, I have to take care of her, even if she says she doesn't need anything and that I can stop worrying, I can't really stop. It's already my habit to be concerned about everyone. I also take care of friends, family, and myself.

Every little thing, I immediately think it's the disease. My head hurts, it's the disease. My stomach hurts, it must be the disease. I'm tired? This is the disease that is killing me. I don't have a disease thank god but you never know when it will catch you. Here is my girlfriend for a year with treatments. So I worry."

The positive is also cause for concern

Excessive worry is a type of disorder that does not always look for a reason to act. People who suffer from excessive worry, turns any difficulty or annoyance into a big problem that requires a lot of worry. The negative thoughts that accompany situations of excessive worry, make situations excessive and even a positive event will turn into a worrying situation for them. They will run disaster scenarios in their heads, look for flaws and failures and warn everyone in their path, against what is to come. They will have difficulty encouraging people in change processes, will have difficulty creating change in their own lives, and will flood themselves with worries.

In the social space, people who suffer from excessive worry are considered critical, negative and unsupportive, while in fact they suffer from an inability to stop worrying, and their suffering is real and deep. When they are told there is no reason to worry, it stresses them out more. In their view, this apparently indicates that the others do not see the approaching disaster as they see it in their imagination, and therefore will not be able to deal with it when it arrives.

Shmuel Checked the chair before sitting down. "That it doesn't break suddenly," he explained to me. "When everything is fine, you have to take into account that something is going to go wrong, so I check," he said, as if trying to lighten the suffering of worry. "It's not that there is anything right now, but it could arise. I worry a lot. Things are never 100 percent, and there is no shortage of things to worry about. It is clear to me that I am a worry type. When the children were small, I checked everything with them. To this day, I think about how they are Getting along and taking care, but I don't call them much anymore because they told me it bothers them.

The youngest son is in the army and you can't talk to him at any time. It's driving me crazy with worry. There are times when I really get depressed from worry, a terrible fear that something might happen, God forbid. It worries me a lot. If I'm not afraid that from too much worry, and lack of sleep, I'll end up hurting myself? I care about my health. The great fear about my health started during the Corona period, and since then every cough and the slightest pain I go to the emergency room. My parents died at a young age and I'm worried that the same thing won't happen to me. This is very worrying.

I do tests and eat healthy, do sports but worry all the time I worry. I can't stop worrying and I'm not allowed to interfere, so all I have to do is worry. If it burdens the children? About the friends? My friends like me. worry and no one is willing to listen to their concern. We have a parliament that meets once a week and shares our concerns for the country, for the children, for ourselves. We are all like that, waking up at night with worries.

Sometimes it makes a rapid pulse, cold sweat, it is not easy to worry all the time. It's a cycle of worry, and thoughts that trigger more worry and more thoughts. Sometimes I say to myself, what are you worrying about so much, as if it matters to anyone that you worry. Like there won't be a war if you worry. But it doesn't help. It is clear to me that there is no benefit in worrying, there is more harm than good, but it is strong, it is such an emotion that arises, and as soon as it starts, like a wave of worries and thoughts and in my head I already see the world being destroyed."

Concern (Illustration: Tami Goldstein)
Concern (Illustration: Tami Goldstein)

Find something to say thank you for

Everyone experiences worries sometimes, and after a while they let go of worries and allow themselves to think about other things. In a state of over-worry, everything causes worry. It prevents joy in life and does not allow enjoyment. Worry is a feeling accompanied by negative thoughts, fear that things are going to go wrong, tension and a feeling of helplessness out of insecurity and lack of trust in the positivity of the present. This positive, according to the chronic worriers, is about to turn negative and severe at any moment.

One of the ways that can help worriers is gratitude. To find the good, to find something to say thank you for. Get used to being thankful for what is, allow yourself to see the positive and recognize it with full recognition, out of gratitude and appreciation. Overworry is a condition that has a history of getting worse. It starts with a small concern and in a very short time turns into a drama with a bad ending. Are you thinking of being in a relationship? There is reason to worry because in a moment it will end in heartbreak.

Do you want the children to play? You should start worrying because it will end badly, someone will fall, something will break. Have you considered the possibility of buying a house? This is a big concern because the mortgage and current expenses will put you in debt that you will not be able to get out of. Do you want to buy a car? Terrible worry because God forbid there will be a car accident. Excessive worry is like a snowball rolling down a slope and gaining momentum.

The thought of doing leads to fear and severe worry, the thought of success leads to anxiety of failure, the thought of the workplace and the professional activity leads to a deep concern that they will be fired, lest they fail in their relationships. You get a threatening reality that increases worry and haunting thoughts about what was, what was wrong with what was, and what will be.

Studies have shown that anxious people worry more, people who do not take responsibility for their lives and blame others for their negative results, are more prone to worry. The worried would prefer to avoid change and would prefer to stick to the familiar way. The worriers find it difficult to decide and choose one thing out of several, and they prefer to avoid choosing as much as possible and leave the choice to others.

Positive thought before sleep

From an evolutionary point of view, the function of worry is to prevent the person from entering dangerous situations. Worry like fear are emotions that are meant to protect us. Worrying brings a person to a state of emotional alertness and seemingly protects against a feeling of crashing when something goes wrong, because the worrier has already anticipated the worst anyway. Worry fills the place of caring, it comes in many cases instead of action and conveys a sense of meaning to the existence of the worrier. "The worry in some cases masks unpleasant feelings towards people, places or even the person towards himself.

A person says that worrying about his financial situation keeps him from sleeping, and as long as he is worried about it, he avoids looking for another source of income that will help improve his situation. A person says I worry and it exhausts me, regarding the relationship with his children, and it prevents him from having an honest conversation with them and finding out together with them their moves for the coming period. When the worry is not chronic, it often leads to finding solutions to the worrying situations. When the worries are chronic, when there is excessive worry, the resulting emotional and mental load prevent the creation of solutions.

Studies done in recent years reveal a connection between lack of sleep and excessive worry. On the one hand excessive worry prevents sleep and on the other hand lack of sleep causes excessive worry. The conclusion of one of the studies was that lack of sleep creates excessive worry which creates difficulty falling asleep. Worry arouses and stresses, creates a tense readiness in the body that interferes with sleep. The laws recommend not thinking worrisome thoughts before going to sleep because this is one of the factors that harms the quality of sleep and puts the person in a cycle of insomnia, worry and so on. That's why it's better before going to sleep to think a positive thought, see positive things, maybe even comedic or romantic clips and think enlightened thoughts.

contact: At watsapBy email

Tammy Goldstein
Tammy Goldstein
Caller, Hilarit, a spiritual teacher specializing in personal and couple holistic counseling and energy therapy to balance the body and emotions, with over 20 years of experience

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