Those who live in conflict line settlements, live in constant threat to their lives and function as if everything is fine. In the professional language it is called resilience. "The continuous efforts of the individual to deal with everyday hardships". The struggles are of the mind, the body, the emotion, the imagination, the belief system and the social groups to which the person sees himself as belonging.
There are several basic types of coping resources - personal resources, such as attitudes and positive activity that the person does on his own, organizational resources, such as support from professionals, health services and the like, and community resources, that satisfy social needs, common areas of activity and external issues that are areas of interest and empowerment.
The inner world and the perception of reality
When there is a crisis, studies in the behavioral sciences talk about ways to cope, the first of which is to try to anticipate what is going to happen. When there are prospects the uncertainty disappears. Perhaps this explains the multitude of prophecies and warnings against further disasters in recent times.
Viktor Frankl, The father of the existentialist approach in psychology, claimed that man can face a difficult reality when he mobilizes meaning to his suffering. Which explains the approach of reward and punishment, lessons from heaven and other reflections on the meaning of suffering, which arise in difficult times.
Freud emphasized the inner world as a main influence on the perception of external reality, Jung He emphasized the power of the imagination as a means of healing and as a guide to the processes of the mind, while Adler and Erickson, emphasized the social, communal world, an external world that man encounters and through which he seeks empowerment and control over his life processes, as well as development and connection.
The community gives meaning
A community is a group of people whose members have a connection, topics of common interest or an activity that connects around a topic. A community can be related to a residential location, work or hobby areas, an organization or any common goal such as a research community or a community to help the needy.
The community is a place for mutual help and sometimes even mutual guarantee. In the community there is belonging, meaning and security, and when there is belonging, the community supports its members, giving a sense of security and comfort that allow each member of the community to feel meaningful.
The meeting between the inner reality and the outer reality
In life processes we bring together the inner reality and the outer reality. During a crisis, when there is no match between the internal and the external and confusion, frustration and even anxiety begins, the community plays an important role in the process of restoration to the feelings of failure. With the help of the community and by working within the community, the person regains the meaning of existence.
Hana Kashansky - volunteers and gives from the heart
Hana Kashansky Belongs to the community of volunteers in Nesher. She was an English teacher at a school in Haifa for 38 years. "When I retired I thought I wouldn't continue to be active, but it didn't suit me. I started volunteering. At first at a school, supporting English teachers, and then through Nesher's volunteer network in several places at the same time. I recommend everyone to go and volunteer, not only when they retire." She says.
"I do what needs to be done without letting the pressure control me"
Hana volunteered to help families during the Corona period, in a warehouse of equipment for refugees from Ukraine, once a week she supports an English teacher at school, at the same time she volunteers in fire fighting answering the 102 telephone, receiving notifications about fires. "It's stressful to receive a message that my house has burned down, but I do what I need to do without letting the pressure control me," she says.
Hana also volunteers at the Association for the Soldier, where she is a partner in the activities and organization of events for Nesher soldiers, as well as for the activity in which the Association for the Soldier adopts units in the north and supports individual soldiers. "During this period, I also volunteer at the emergency center in Nesher, helping with boxes for soldiers and at the emergency center where things are collected for evacuees." Yesterday Hana was recruited to teach English at Kibbutz Sdot Yam to the children who were evacuated from the surrounding area.
"It excites me. There is a volunteer coordinator in Nesher who does a wonderful job," she says and adds: "Since the war began, there have been over 1000 volunteers, corrections personnel, study, education, help with medicine and shopping for the sick and elderly, taking care of animals. Everything anyone needs is registered In the group of volunteers, and before they finish the trial, there are already volunteers."
The engine for volunteering
I ask Hana what motivates her to volunteer? And she says there is a lot of satisfaction in it. "You are needed, you contribute, and it's a completely different feeling when you do things not for money, and not because you have to. Volunteering is doing from the soul and even the thanks you receive is different. A real thank you. In addition, the volunteers are a community of amazing people that I've met."
Communities for change
Until two weeks ago, it seemed that the country was splitting into opposing forces that were busy bickering. And then the most terrible thing happened, and like a magic wand a union and fusion was created, and all at once, all for all together.
But wait. Is it really only in times of disaster or war that we are united? The political struggle that was here until a moment before the terrible disaster occurred in the Gaza Envelope created communities united by a common interest, those for and those against, on the various issues. Kiss brothers, alternative girls and others. The struggle for the road to democracy, the legal system, the structure of the government, social and economic issues, all of these brought people to the streets and created communities. When there was a feeling that an entire village was needed to move something, the whole village was gathered.
Even when I take us a moment before. Before this government was formed. Were we really uncaring for each other? I remember the tent protest to lower housing prices, a protest that created cohesive communities, I remember a connection between citizens to lower the prices of cottage cheese, the communities that came out against the increase in prices in Osem, the struggle that woke everyone up about disability benefits, and in fact, it seems that there were many connections for the purpose of a struggle or to create change
While in times of peace, peace and love, each in his own little community, in times of crisis, unity contains many communities that work in a wonderful mutual bond.
Zehava Nebat - saves food and takes care of people
golden sprout Volunteers in several organizations, but her main project is saving food. Today she brings food from the wholesale market, from supermarkets and bakeries to several places where other volunteers cook for soldiers and evacuees from the conflict line settlements. "Mutual guarantee has always been here," she says, "People take care of people, it's just that they don't always pay attention to it."
It started during the Corona period when people lost their sources of livelihood. At that time, even those who were financially capable, discovered that they had less and needed the support of the community.
"People who felt safe, independent, suddenly can't buy fruits and vegetables at the supermarket. This happened to several of my friends, and then the idea came up to take discarded things from the supermarkets, collect them, sort them, and distribute them. It turns out that the supermarkets bring something new once a week regardless of the condition of the products on the shelves. They Vegetables, fruits, dairy products, pastries are removed from the shelves, and huge amounts are thrown away."
"40 volunteers joined the project, went with vehicles that are in all the food stores and collected"
Zehava wrote in the groups and communities she is a member of that she intends to collect the food before it is thrown away, and distribute it, and people began to contact her who asked to volunteer and help in saving food.
How do you do that? "Approach the managers of the stores. The Ministry of Health requires you to throw in the bins, so you have to arrive exactly when they throw away, coordinate the exact time so that it goes straight to the car instead of the bin. They place it next to the bin and we put it in the car in our cartons. 40 volunteers joined the project, passing with vehicles that are in every The grocery stores and Aspo," she says. Then the shop owners who heard about the food rescue started contacting her, saying that it was a shame to throw away what was left at the end of the day.
Exciting stories
Zehava continues to tell: "There were exciting stories here. Mothers of babies who said that they could finally make fruit puree for their child. Elderly people who could not afford it and received challah for Shabbat, many stories. They also came from the afternoon workers who handed over the prepared food that was left at the end of the day, confectioners who handed over cakes and rolls that were left over at the end of the day Today. The people themselves turned so that it would not be thrown away and so that it would be for those in need. The volunteers made deliveries to sick families, the disabled, the needy. It is impossible to send everything, I asked people to take responsibility, say what is needed and it will be sent. The same goes for those who come to take food, take enough of what they need and leave it for others ".
activity in a different format
Zehava's project continues, and since today she does not want to take the people out for collection because of the security situation, the activity has been reduced. "During the week, the collection is mainly for the benefit of people who cook in quantities for soldiers and evacuees. There are groups of breweries that are in contact, and I donate to them what is collected during the week. On Fridays, people come to my house in the front yard, to take what they need. There are two refrigerators there with dairy products, bread and baked goods, and there are fruits and vegetables that we saved. The community has several hundred people who receive notification of the food collected and come to take it for their consumption," she says.
Support groups and virtual communities
Joining communities in the living environment as well as Internet communities, has become a significant concern in the last decade. Urban communities, communities of age groups in community settlements, and communities with common interests in digital media have arisen. For example, the "free delivery" community, where the members hand over objects, write down what they lack and ask to contribute themselves to joint projects, or the "light community", where meditations are delivered by volunteers to calm the tense period.
Community - a supportive space
A community is a supportive space. It allows a person to feel a sense of belonging, to feel part of a group of people with a common interest. There are communities of collectors, communities of diabetics, communities of travelers to Israel, the 60+ community, and many other communities. The community is a social network and belonging to the community allows a person to express himself and be significant. It turns out that meaningful relationships are the building blocks of human happiness.
Aliza Elkayam Abdi - a social leader for the elderly
Aliza Elkayam Abdi, Makarit Yam, retired from the civil service, active entrepreneur and social leader, local volunteer coordinator, volunteer leader of a project for the benefit of the elderly for a culture and leisure company in the Dorot community center. All year she is busy, and her spaces, as she says, are full of goodness.
"Every day has special stories"
"What is happening today is that the contact with the people is through the phone, because they are afraid to go out and come to the community center. I recruited volunteers to call lonely elderly people and people with families who need help and the reactions are exciting. People are happy to be cared for. They are not used to someone caring about them. Every day there are special stories I try to help in all sorts of ways.
Some people cry from fear and worry, tell me about their difficulties when I call, about their needs and anxieties. I calm down, help what I can. Works a lot with disadvantaged people, coordinates and connects the elderly population and their needs in times of calm and in times of emergency. People talk to me, saying that they have no food at home and are afraid to go shopping. I activate the volunteers to help, bring shopping to those who need it, cook for those who need special food, and do a lot to calm down," Aliza says.
WhatsApp groups with hundreds of people from all the Kiryas
She has WhatsApp groups with hundreds of people from all the Kiryas, and Khaliza sends them meditations, breathing exercises, pieces of music, inspirational stories, videos, everything possible to calm them down.
"I need to be where people need me. This was my and my husband's life project. Two years ago my husband passed away, and I am continuing the project. Until we started, there was no activity for the adult community, what's more, not everyone speaks Hebrew. There are Russian speakers, Amharic speakers, and everyone We are so happy about the social bridge, about the community that was created to support them," she says and says that in addition to all this she is also a social clown and goes to nursing homes, to sick children in the community, happy and entertaining, I hope we can all live here happily.
Be compassionate and improve personal resilience
Buddhist psychology emphasizes the idea of compassion, that emotional caring that awakens respect for the other and the desire to help him. Unlike intellectual care, compassion allows you to get closer to the experience of the other, to feel what he feels and to want to help him.
Usually when you feel the suffering and pain of others, you want to help. And so we, who take care of our small communities throughout the year, become one nation that takes care of everyone in times of crisis.
Social change for the treatment of individual well-being
In 1965, there was a conference of psychologists in the USA, and there they came to the conclusions that psychology should focus on social change in order to take care of the well-being of the individual. That's where community psychology actually began. It turned out that a benevolent community, one that fosters the common good and increases the responsibility of the individual to the group and of the group to the individual in the present and in the future, Improves personal resilience and quality of life.
Rabbi Ram HaCohen - victory in battle depends on the unity of the people
Rabbi Rav HaCohen, The leader of Yeshiva Atniel wrote in one of his articles that this unity is not only a tactical element in battle, it is the foundation on which the IDF and the government rest, from which they draw the ability to fight the enemy. He points out that the Sages insisted that victory in battle depends on the unity of the people.
Rapid rehabilitation in places with a supportive community
A study that deals with understanding the feelings of people within a community after natural disasters, examined the challenges of rehabilitation and found that in places where there was support from a supportive community, the rehabilitation was faster and more successful than in areas where there was no community support for individual rehabilitation.
The feeling that the community is there for you is a source of strength for the members of the community
During the Corona period, the number of virtual communities that were designed for mutual support, to support the elderly who were left alone and could not help themselves, and at the same time to help abandoned animals, increased. The feeling that the community is there for you is a source of resilience for the members of that community. The person who is part of the community is more than an individual. He represents the entire community. Many people feel this way when they are abroad. Moshe is not only Moshe. He is Moshe from Israel. The same is true in workplaces, unit pride, family pride, a person's belonging to his community.
Cooperation and social tolerance
The importance of cooperation and social tolerance in the disaster response stages is extremely important. Social tolerance and the ability to share and belong to a supportive community improves rehabilitation. All studies indicate that social support is essential to help return to a normal life. Research done after Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans revealed that the community's ability to build social networks that work for the individual helped to return to normality, and the residents' involvement in rebuilding their neighborhoods created a mutual guarantee that worked in the residents' favor.
Our strength is in our unity
So what do we learn from all this? It is worth being compassionate all year round, not only in times of crisis, that a person needs a supportive community in which he feels significant, and that the mutual guarantee and unity we show in times of war, are with us all year round, but we don't always notice it.
They tell of an old father who asked each of his children to bring some twigs. When they brought it he showed them that the twigs can easily be broken one by one, but when they are together in a pile, they are almost unbreakable. So are we, our strength is in our unity.
Thank you Tami for interesting articles 🙏, a big hug ♥️🇮🇱👍