Sexual assault and coping Merav Boaz, attorney at the sexual abuse treatment unit

Rape, sexual abuse and dealing with it • Things you won't hear about in the media

Against the background of the severe gang rape of the young woman in Eilat

30 stood in line

The whole country was shocked last week, by the revelation of the news about 30 guys who stood in line, to satisfy their sexual lust, in a brutal way, and raped a 16-year-old girl one after the other.
That day none of these guys remembered his mother, his sister, his grandmother and all the women who are part of his family.

30 • The unfathomable number

At the most terrible moment, when the number 30 took on an unimaginable and incomprehensible meaning, and brought an entire nation to street demonstrations, strikes and endless posts on the web.
That day, one number was missing…

one. Only one to stop the horror

one. One of the 30 guys, who will stop the horror and say no.
One of the hotel staff who won't close his eyes and stop the horror.
One of the guests who wasn't standing in line, but saw, didn't stop and kept walking.
There wasn't this one. Not the one either.

The victim will not forget this day

The girl, whose youth ended at that moment, will need long treatments throughout her life, because she will not forget this day. He will come back to haunt her at different intersections. This girl, although most of us don't know, no one will ever forget.

The boys and girls you don't hear about

So what happens to other teenagers who are raped in homes, places of entertainment, with "friends", acquaintances and nobody sees them, hears them and the media doesn't report them?

What happens to those boys and girls, who over time mature, and still carry the "secret" and the shame from that sexual injury, which has become "who they are", whether they admit it or not?

What happens to all those women and men we meet at our bTefnit Center for the treatment of sexual injuries, when they are exposed to the news that once again "history repeats itself", and again the worst of all happened, and another girl or boy joined the cycle of sexual vulnerability?

Public and media engagement

For those anonymous and unknown victims, the media and public preoccupation with the issue of rape meets a painful and wounded layer of the psyche. The media exposure brings up memories that were deeply buried for many years.
Any mention of the subject can be a trigger for themEmotional flooding that can be expressed in the following signs:

• Flashbacks - in which the victims experience the harm in the inner world over and over again. Whether it's by memories that float and feel "alive" that exist here and now, or by the body's reluctance to sounds, smells, or anything that reminds of the injury.
• Anxiety - arise from the memories of the experience.
• Difficulties in daily functioning.
• Seclusion and inward gathering - A feeling of distance from people, narrowing the range of emotions without emotional connection.
• Depression - Hopelessness for the future.

The difficulty of the victims

Some of them will not come to their treatment in the coming week, because it is too difficult. Because they are exposed, because they experience the sexual abuse again and again and they are unable to speak. Trying to keep the worst out of everything.

Along with those who are already in our treatment, it is likely that there will be other women and men, who have not yet come to treatment, and will experience the same symptoms. Unlike those who are already in treatment, those who did not come to treat the injury they experienced, will be left alone.

Don't stay alone

There will be no one who can help them process the vulnerability, the pain, the feelings that the brutal rape arouses in them, and they will try, in all kinds of ways, most of which are probably not effective, to try and escape from the feelings and thoughts that the injury arouses in them.

"Tefnit" Center • Treatment of victims of sexual assault
Phone: 04-6803380

A turnaround center for the treatment of victims of sexual assault

We, the care team b"Tafnit" center for the treatment of victims of sexual assault, the residents of Haifa and the Carmel Castle, who feel that they need to talk to a professional about the feelings that arise following the brutal rape of the girl in Eilat, invite you, about the feelings that arise in you, or those of you who carry a painful secret and a sense of shame alone for a long time, to pick up the phone, come to us and ask for help .

Don't be left alone with your private horror. You can live a better life with the right treatment!

All you need is to call us:

"Tefnit" Center • Treatment of victims of sexual assault
Phone: 04-6803380

Ask to talk to me and together we will embark on a common journey, after which you will have the tools and the ability to deal with the hurt and lead a life worth living.

Merav Boaz is the coordinator of the unit for the treatment of victims of sexual assault at the Tafnit Center, Department of Social Services, Tirat Carmel Municipality.